The Generous Wife

Moods. We all have them.

When Paul is having a down day, his mood tends to pull me down too. Thankfully he’s usually happy and invested in his day.

I tend to me the moodier spouse. I’m the introvert and wear out emotionally much sooner. I have more emotional baggage to deal with. Thank goodness I’m not fighting the monthly hormone roller coaster anymore.

I have to remember that moods are contagious.

That doesn’t mean I put on a fake smile and act like I’m over my emotional blues. I just need to communicate well and let him know what and why. I need to work through my emotions and walk out the other side. I need to be sensitive to the impact of my emotions on him.

I’m working on growing my gratitude and learning to act well even when I’m struggling with my day. It’s a faster turnaround and it’s a blessing to my husband.

Positive people also have negative thoughts, they just don’t let those thoughts grow and destroy them.  Author Unknown

♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you communicate your good moods and do damage control for the difficult ones.

♥ To Love, Honor, & Vacuum: MBTI and Marriage: Do You See the Forest or the Trees? Are you a sensor or an intuitive?

♥ Kevin A. Thompson: Love Is the Net When love is present, we are empowered to grow.

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Have you ever found yourself doing something because that’s the way your family did it or that’s what most folks do? Do you and your husband live out your marriage by others’ standards, doing what is expected of you?

Couples are both the same and quite different.

We are all human and you will see themes of commonality, but we also have our differences. We are each unique creations and our marriage relationships are unique.

It’s OK to look at what others do, but do take the time to see if it’s a good fit for you and your husband. Don’t fall into a norm without thinking it through.

Are there areas of your marriage that aren’t working well? What could you do differently?

Do what will build your unique marriage.

Be who you are, not who the world wants you to be.  Coco Chanel

♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you understand what is unique about your marriage.

♥ Intimacy in Marriage: 3 Keys to Passionate Sex Julie’s written a new guide and it’s free!

♥ Calm.Healthy.Sexy.: Her New Shop Gaye has gathered all her goodies in one place ~ diet and exercise help, marriage encouragement, and more.

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(Originally posted on August 21, 2015.)

Have you had that talk with your husband? The one about which things are private and which are not?

Intimacy requires a certain amount of privacy, things you only share with each other.

Take the time to discuss where the line is between public and private. And, honestly, there will likely be some difference of opinion. This is one place where you’ll probably want to give in and honor your spouse’s need for privacy even if you don’t quite understand it or agree with it. (I’m not talking about abuse and such. When you have serious problems, the need for help trumps the need for privacy.)

The sense of intimacy in your marriage is a tender plant and needs to be guarded.

Once you’ve lost your privacy, you realize you’ve lost an extremely valuable thing.  Billy Graham

♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you and your spouse set healthy privacy standards.

♥ The Forgiven Wife: Oral Sex: Blessing Your Husband and Learning to Be Blessed A collection of posts to answer your questions. While you are there, please donate and help an excellent writer get to the Declare Conference this fall.

♥ Kevin A. Thompson: When You Fight, Look For This Learn to repair those breaks in your relationship.

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My husband wrote a post a few days ago that is stuck in my head. He spoke to the guys asking them if the vision of married life they painted for their wife had changed. Have they talked to their wife about it? What vision do they currently have and can they get on the same page with their wife?

People change. Life happens. It’s understandable that how you envision life may change as well. The important part is to communicate what is going on in your head and heart. Do you and your husband need to talk about where you are going as a married couple? Have your dreams changed? Has life thrown you a few curves?

Have that talk.

Happy marriages are built on dreaming together.  Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott

♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you and your husband create a shared dream for where your marriage is headed.

♥ (in)courage: Seeing Each Other the Way Jesus Sees Us You are one of my people.  :)

♥ The Divine Reflection: Why You Should NEVER Try to Compromise with Your Spouse Collaborate for a win/win.

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My bathroom sink area is a mess. It drives me nuts. It looks bad and it’s harder to clean with all those bits cluttering it up.

I could blame Paul (it’s mostly his stuff) or I could team up with him, figure out the why, and try a possible solution. (Move the less used stuff to another place to make room in the cabinet for the stuff he uses most?)

The blame game brings on defensiveness.

Teaming up makes us both feel respected and capable. Together we can fix the problem.

Easy choice.

Fix the problem, not the blame.  Author Unknown

♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you see your spouse as a teammate rather than someone to blame.

♥ Cheri Gregory: The Best Thing to Say When Someone Makes a Big Mistake Very good wisdom. Something to keep in mind when hubby messes up.

♥ Shaunti Feldhahn: When You Criticize and He Withdraws, This is What’s Really Happening Understanding his anger. It may be different than you think.

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