In reading Gottman’s book The Relationship Cure, I’ve been rather convicted about being present in conversation (I’m the distractable sort.).
I am trying to listen more and I’m actively looking for ways to speak in a positive way (gossip, sarcasm, negative stories, and general snarkiness are on my hit list).
I look for opportunities to share a kind word, a compliment, or a story with a good ending. I might share something funny or creative I saw online and, of course, talking about the grandson is good (my son and his family just got the cutest dog). :)
As an exercise, the next time you sit down to a meal with your sweetie, look for ways to speak positively in conversation.
Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless. Mother Teresa
♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you keep your speech positive and kind.
♥ The Romantic Vineyard: Cherishing Your Spouse by Supporting Their Interests Handle differing interests with enthusiasm.
♥ Marc & Angel Hack Life: 31 Morning Journaling Prompts that Will Change the Way You Think What interesting and challenging questions!
The last time I shared about my bullet journal, I mentioned I have a spot to write down something for which I am grateful. It’s a daily practice for me and it’s making a difference.
I confess it was a bit of a test for me. The research says it makes a difference and I thought, what the heck, I’ll give it a try.
I was sitting at my dining table the other day, just sitting there doodling and writing. Suddenly, out of the blue, I saw its impact. I’m happier with my life and the people in my life. Nothing has changed significantly over the last few months, but my attitudes have changed and because of that I can see more of the good in my life.
I encourage y’all to grab a notebook and make it a daily practice to be grateful. Be sure to add in various good things about your husband and marriage.
It is not happy people who are thankful. It is thankful people who are happy. Author Unknown
♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you see all the good in your life.
♥ The Romantic Vineyard: Date Night Challenge – “G” Date A little creativity can give you an endless number of date ideas. (I love the creativity of their alphabet dates.)
♥ Hot, Holy & Humorous: 5 Times of Day to Make Love Try a different time of day!
Love is patient … 1 Corinthians 13:4a NIV
I’ve been thinking about the love passage lately and wondering how to apply it to my marriage. So I thought I’d use Sundays to walk through the passage and talk about what these verses might look like in a practical sense.
patient – able to accept or tolerate delays, problems, or suffering without becoming annoyed or anxious
So when my husband is running late, I need to be patient (without any kind of attitude). When he’s having a hard time explaining himself or when he leaves a mess on the kitchen table, I need to graciously accept his limitations and differences.
I don’t think it means we can’t talk about what bothers us, but I do think it means a certain level of grace and willingness to tolerate differences or moments of carelessness.
♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you see areas where you can grow in patience toward your husband.
Recently a wife said to me about her husband, “He is a ——.” The —— was a pretty harsh word and an inaccurate label (I thought).
It made me spend a bit of time thinking about how we talk about our husbands.
Yes, there are times and places to talk about the hard stuff, but a far kinder and more accurate way of talking about them is to talk about their behavior instead of giving them harsh labels. It reminded me of what my husband and I affectionately call the “raca” scripture.
But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell. Matthew 5:22 NIV
“Raca” is a word of contempt that basically means “worthless.” It’s name calling and it’s just plain rude. Jesus doesn’t seem to be in favor of it either.
Again, it’s OK to talk about problems, just take the time to drop the harsh labels and find kind words to talk about behaviors. Don’t be guilty of using the dreaded word “Raca.”
♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you change your perspective from labels to behaviors.
♥ Holley Gerth: Our Worst Tendencies Are Not Our Destinies Define yourself by Who loves you.
♥ Awaken-Love: Kegel Exercises – Here I Come Strong Kegel muscles make for great sex!
I love books. My dad was an English teacher for a number of years and he gave me a love of literature and learning.
I am so grateful for that gift. Books open up a world of information and adventure. They are great mental stimulation and make your conversations more interesting. Over the years I have collected hundreds of books (that were given away when we became RVers). Now my Kindle houses my growing collection of books.
I mentioned previously, I’m reading a marriage book a month as one of my 2018 personal goals. It’s been good for me. I’ve learned a few things and every day or two I read something that encourages me to grow my marriage. Right now I am practicing kindness and I’m trying to be more aware of and respond to my husband’s bids (this comes from Gottman’s book The Relationship Cure).
I encourage y’all to read marriage books as well, perhaps even create your own marriage library. Marriage books are like good friends who give you great marriage advice.
The book you don’t read won’t help. Jim Rohn
♥ Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you find good marriage books and resources.
♥ Assume Love: Worrying is Not a Love Language Live and love in the present.
♥ Kevin A. Thompson: Sometimes It’s Worth a Fight Fight for the important stuff. Chill on the rest.