Look for opportunities to kiss your husband.
Kiss him as he’s getting ready for work. Kiss him at his desk or when he’s settled on the couch. Kiss him as he’s moving to the table for a meal or when he’s headed out the door to run errands.
See what kind of difference it makes to add a few kisses to your day.
Kissing is the first and last way a couple connects. If you stop kissing, you stop connecting.Lou Paget
The other day I asked Paul about his play on Minecraft (it’s an online creative world kind of thing). I spent the next little bit listening to Paul go on fighting zombie pig men, harvesting trees, and the different play modes.
It was actually kind of fun.
I gave him an opportunity to talk about something he enjoys that we don’t usually share. I learned about his brand of creativity and we engaged in talk about a playful (rather than serious) activity.
Over the weekend, invite your husband to share about the things he does and enjoys.
We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing. (This is one of Paul’s favorite quotes.) :)George Bernard Shaw
You can’t change your husband. You know that, right?
You do, however, have influence and how you treat him will have an impact on how he responds to you. No, I’m not saying that you will get back from him exactly what you give. It’s more about creating a tone of kindness and generosity in your relationship.
It’s a bit like tuning forks. If you start resonating on one frequency, the tendency is for others to try to match or harmonize with your frequency to create a sense of harmony and balance.
Living in kindness and generosity makes it easier for others to do likewise.
Blessed is the influence of one true, loving human soul on another.George Eliot
(Originally posted on May 21, 2019.)
My sweetie loves Quora. Actually, I think it is the thoughtful conversation and sharing of ideas that he loves. It also challenges him to hone his communication skills.
I could get bent about the time he spends there or I can honor his passion and make room for it. If I need his time and attention there is still plenty available and if I want to do it one better I can ask about his conversations and encourage him to share with me.
I will probably never enjoy writing on Quora (really, so not my thing), but I sure do enjoy hearing Paul talk about his world and what interests him. There is a real joy there and I’m all about making his life sweet.
So often I hear gals getting upset about their husband’s passion with football, fishing, or any number of activities or interests. You can fight it, but you are in effect tearing at your husband’s heart. Far better to make room for his passions and negotiate the “when” and “how much.”
And, really, if you support his passions, he is more likely to see you in a favorable light and want to spend time with you. If you fuss about his passions, he’ll be hurt and possibly angry. It’s human nature.
We all need personal expression (that goes for you too!)
Passion is oxygen to the soul.Author Unknown
I’ve been reading The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday (I find a lot of interesting books at discount on BookBub).
Here’s an interesting quote that encouraged me.
When failure does come, ask: What went wrong here? What can be improved? What am I missing? This helps birth alternative ways of doing what needs to be done, ways that are often much better than what we started with. Failure puts you in corners you have to think your way out of. It is a source of breakthroughs.Ryan Holiday
Honestly, failure is usually unpleasant, but it doesn’t have to be the last word (in life or in marriage). Use it as a stepping stone of knowledge and experience in the process of learning and getting better.
I’m encouraging y’all and myself this morning to take a breath and lighten up a bit when it comes to failure (or just not doing as well as you would have liked). Let failure spur you on to creativity and better ways of learning and doing.