Notes of Blessing

October 13, 2014

in the generous life

My sweetie has been away at a men’s retreat.

Before he left he wrote messages on sticky notes and left them for me to find.

The cute twist was that he placed them where I would find them as I walked through my day. I’d pick up my coffee cup and there was a heart or I’d slip into the shower and there was a sexy little note. He knows me well enough to know my daily patterns. He also knew some of the things I would be facing while he was gone and he left me encouraging notes too.

The boy has made major points with me.

The best portion of a good man’s life. His little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love.  William Wordsworth

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to show you how to bless your husband with words.

line

Here is another blogger who has taken on the CMBA challenge ~ marriage wisdom from family.

The Romantic Vineyard: Modeled Words of Wisdom

line

Becoming His Eve: When It Seems Impossible: 30 Dates in November Challenge Do all or part of the challenge for some date night fun.

line

Image credit © Lori Byerly / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

{ 0 comments }

A Theory Tested

October 12, 2014

in the generous life

Yesterday I talked about positive and negative marriage lists and how we tend to drag out one or the other when things get stressful.

I was talking mostly theory (I got the idea from Seth Godin), but today I had a real life experience that was pretty interesting.

While doing laundry I got aggravated over a mess in the basement.

Mentally I started to go into the litany of messes I have had to deal with over the years, but then I remembered Seth’s post and I stopped myself. I made a list of all the things my husband does that blesses me and listed all the ways my husband has grown and changed over the years.

There is still a mess in the basement, but my attitude is more gracious and cleaning up the mess feels far more doable (it’s not buried under a pile of fussiness and blame).

You go, Seth.

The thing is, at every juncture, during every crisis, in every moment of doubt, you have a choice. You will pull out one (virtual) list or the other. You’ll read and reread it, and rely on it to decide how to proceed. Up to you.  Seth Godin

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to help you develop a go-to positive marriage list for those fussy moments in marriage.

line

Image credit © Lori Byerly

{ 2 comments }

Which List?

October 11, 2014

in the generous life

Seth Godin’s recent post talked about two lists – one with all the good stuff in your life (the successes, the great circumstances, etc.) and one with the tough stuff (the failures, the criticisms, the bad breaks, etc.). His thought was, when you’re stressed, you tend to pull out one of the lists and that motivates your choices.

I think this has marriage applications.

If you have a positive marriage list (the sweet gift he brought home yesterday, that time your husband was there for you, etc.) and a negative marriage list (his habit of leaving his socks on the floor, the time he didn’t phone and he was three hours late, etc.), which list will you lean on when you have a stressful marriage moment? Which list will motivate your choices?

It’s an interesting perspective. I’ll have to give it some thought the next time Paul and I have a stressful moment.

The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live. Flora Whittemore

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to help you embrace the positive in your marriage and give you wisdom to see and deal with the negative.

line

The XY Code: 5 Things I Wish Someone had told my Wife about Male Sexuality The title says it all.

line

Ferguson Values: 5 Ways to Build A Durable Marriage How to help your marriage repel the pressures of life. 

line

Image courtesy of stockimages / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

{ 0 comments }

Small Things

October 10, 2014

in the generous life

I was wandering around in The Generous Wife archive and read this post. It encouraged me and so I thought I would send it out again, hopefully to encourage y’all.

On Sundays my church gathering is studying 1 Peter (this week it was 4:7-11). One of the points our pastor made was that we need to be “deliberate and faithful to use our gifts.” He spoke about a variety of gifts and how they are all important. I think for the most part we don’t understand how the simplest of things we do can be a gift from God and a gift that can be used to bless those around us. We sort of discount it as just something we do … that anyone could do.

And while that’s true to a degree, the bottom line is that we can do it and God wants us to use what He’s given us. Our gifts may seem small, but small can have great impact and be strategically important. And small tends to become big over time if we will be faithful and consistent in what we do.  

Years ago, I was “just an ordinary wife and mom,” changing diapers, baking dinner, and doing all the usual things of life. I started to learn about generosity. One day I thought it might be fun to blog about it and The Generous Wife was born. All these years it’s been just a simple blog, a small thing, a few words written each day, but during those years I have watched God use this small thing to change lives (my own included). I’m still “just an ordinary wife and mom” (now grandma) and I’m still doing “small things,” but I have a bit more faith in what God can do with small things because of the history that I have with Him. He can turn a few fish and a loaf of bread into a buffet for a crowd. He can turn a kind word or a simple gift into a life changing moment. Do not underestimate our God!

You have gifts too. Yes, you do.

Maybe you’re a terrific cook. Maybe you have a way with people that communicates warmth and acceptance. Maybe you’re great with numbers, or you have a way with plants. These gifts may seem small or insignificant to you, but what God can do with them is amazing! Let me repeat that ~ what God can do with them is amazing!

Why not make a list of the things that you do well, things that you have a natural gift for and things you enjoy doing (no matter how small or unimportant they may seem). How can you bless your husband with those gifts?  How can you bless your kids, neighbors and friends?

Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms … so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.  1 Peter 4:10-11  NIV

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to show you your gifts and abilities. Ask Him how to enjoy them and use them to bless your sweetie and others.

line

Here are a couple more bloggers who have taken on the CMBA challenge ~ marriage wisdom from family.

Hot, Holy & Humorous: Sex Wisdom I Learned & Teach
Pearl’s OysterBed: Words of Wisdom: Food Equals Love

line

Are you shopping online this week? Please start on the Shop and Support TGW page. It won’t change your purchase price, but I will receive a small commission.

line

Image credit © Martinahavlova | Dreamstime.com

{ 0 comments }

How Many Kisses?

October 9, 2014

in the generous life

When your husband is busy (but not with anything terribly important), give him a little kiss. A couple of minutes later give him another kiss. Wait a couple of minutes for another little kiss. 

 

See how many kisses it takes before he figures out you want more.

A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point.  Mistinguett

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to teach you how to bless your husband sexually.

line

Refine Us: The Secret Sauce to a Great Marriage You don’t have to wait for a crisis before pursuing the marriage you desire.

line

Happy Wives Club: 7 Easy & Fun Date Ideas You Should Do This Weekend More ideas to put on your date night to-try list.

line

Image credit © Gabriel Blaj | Dreamstime.com

{ 0 comments }

What kind of lighting do you have in your bedroom?

 

Basic lighting is good (you don’t want to run into things), but there are so many lighting options that can give you a little romantic ambiance.

candles
twinkle lights
paper lanterns
a dimmer on your nightstand light
(mirrors to reflect light)

What lighting options do you find fun or romantic?

In the right light, at the right time, everything is extraordinary.  Aaron Rose

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to show you how to make your bedroom a special place for you and your husband.

line

Here are a few bloggers who have taken on the CMBA challenge ~ marriage wisdom from family.

Stupendous Marriage: Lessons From 40 Years of Marriage
The Forgiven Wife: Louder Than Words
The Generous Husband: Words and Wisdom: Family

line

Holly Gerth: You’re Already Accepted “Real friends tell you when you have something in your teeth.”

line

Image courtesy of foto76 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

{ 2 comments }

Fancy That

October 7, 2014

in the generous life

Going out for a cheeseburger? Take a few moments to pretty up or go all out and dress up to make the outing special.

Hubby can dress up and join in, or not. It’s mostly about having some fun and giving your husband a little eye candy. 

A dress that zips up the back will bring a husband and wife together.  James H. Boren

line

Prayer Prompt  Ask God to help you inject a little fun and romance into everyday life.

line

(in)courage: When You Feel Like Damaged Goods “Other’s preferences and decisions to choose or reject us, don’t define our worth ~ Jesus does. And He chooses us every time.”

line

Encourage Your Spouse: My Husband Told Me To Get Out Very interesting post. I’m going to have to ruminate about how it applies to me. Yes, very interesting.

line

Image credit © Graphic79 | Dreamstime.com

{ 0 comments }