Archive for the ‘to consider’ Category

Closing the Gap

Friday, May 24th, 2013

My husband (The Generous Husband) recently challenged bloggers:

My challengeMake it a point to celebrate the male sex drive anywhere you have influence. Stop allowing sex to be treated as shameful or evil. Proclaim that God gave men a strong sex drive for a reason, and that we must embrace that if we want to have healthy marriages, families, and communities.

My perspective is that men have an easier time of seeing their sexuality as an integral part of who they are. Women have a harder time of making that connection.

Men have an "outie". Their genitals are right out there where they can see them. They handle them to wash and urinate. At puberty they take on a life of their own and sex drive ramps up.

Women have many cultural messages about "good girls" and our genitals are harder to see and explore.

By the time we are adults and ready to marry, guys are light years ahead in understanding their sexuality. Women can easily see male sexuality as "too much" by comparison.

I think the important thing to emphasize is that male sexuality is not bad, just different. Each gender has something to bring to the bedroom that is important. We're meant to invite each other into our differences and have our sexual experience and understanding broadened because of that.

We need what our husbands bring to the bedroom and they need what we offer.

As a practical suggestion, I would encourage women to be intentional about exploring their sexuality. Read good books on sexuality, slow down in the bedroom, take more time, talk about sex with your husband, make a point of thinking about sex (remember how good it was last night), and pray about growing in your understanding and experience of sex.

God made us sexual beings and He meant for sex to be enjoyable for both husbands and wives. I believe He called it "very good."

Oh, lover and beloved, eat and drink! Yes, drink deeply of your love!  Song of Songs 5:1b  NLT

Links may be monetized.
Image courtesy of imagerymajestic / FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Ferguson Values: How Long Does It Take to Become Proficient at Marriage? A quality marriage is based on time.


Holley Gerth: You’re Not Compared Start celebrating who you are and the God who made you that way.


Hot, Holy and Humorous: Are You in a Sexual Rut? Throw off the rut and get fresh with your spouse!


 

Put It Away

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

cuecardsI've been going through my books and reducing the pile. I try to keep only those books I will read again or use as reference (plus my pile of "to read" books).

One of the books that I'm keeping is Cue Cards for Life by Christina Steinorth, MA MFT. The title says it all.  The author shares a number of simple reminders - cue cards - that will help you develop healthier relationships. There are sections for marriage, parenting, your workplace and more.

One cue card that stood out to me today was:

Put your personal communication device away.

So simple, but, honestly, haven't you seen people spend more time texting or calling than engaging in conversation with the people right next to them?

Putting your phone away tells the other person that they have your full attention and that they matter to you. Not a bad message to send to your sweetie.

Choose to be phone free when you have an opportunity to spend time with your husband ~ at the dinner table, while watching a DVD, or when you're taking a walk in the neighborhood.

Links may be monetized.
Image courtesy of Amazon.com


Calm Healthy Sexy: Pursuing Our Dreams – "Why not me? Why not now?" What's your dream?


To Love, Honor and Vacuum: 3 Steps to Amazing Sex If You’re Remarried Great guest post from Julie of Intimacy in Marriage.


Becoming Minimalist: Don't Forget the Past. Learn from It. Wonderful list of ways that we can benefit from the past.


 

Self-Discipline and Matching Socks

Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013

Over the last few months I've been more self-disciplined with the laundry.

I've never been really great at it (folding and putting away clothes ... well, slow at best), but one day I realized how tough it was on my sweetie (and the rest of my family over the years) when I didn't get clothes back in the closet and drawers in a timely way.

I sat down and diagrammed out my clothing system and then asked myself where the hang up was. No surprise that it was the "put away" part.

So I just made a rule for myself that when each load was done, I would hang things up, fold the rest and put everything away right then. I've done a pretty good job of it and it's made our lives a bit smoother and there is less clutter in the bedroom and the laundry room (although I have a pretty impressive collection of lonely socks).

A little self-discipline can be a good thing. Is there some part of your life or household that is not working? Think it through and brainstorm some solutions to try. Your sweetie and family will thank you.

We are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act, but a habit.  Aristotle

Links may be monetized.
Image credit Lori Byerly


The Forgiven Wife: Perfect Conditions If all you see is the weeds, you will miss the tulips.


Marriage Gems: Don’t be Afraid to Underachieve in Life to Better Achieve in Your Family Life Be counter-cultural in your approach to life and family.


If you are shopping online this week, please start on the Shop and Support TGW page. It won't change your purchase price, but I receive a small commission. (I've updated links and added some international shopping pages.) New merchants I've added:

legalzoom
vistaprint


 

Cheerful Generosity

Sunday, May 19th, 2013

Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.  2 Corinthians 9:7  ESV

We usually hear this scripture at church when there is an offering. Certainly that is a good time and place to consider it.

However, I think it applies to everything, including our marriage relationship.

We need to consider how generosity plays into our marriage. Where and how can we give cheerfully? (Reluctant giving doesn't say love to our spouses. It actually feels kind of creepy.)

I find it easier to break my life down and look at its parts. Where can I be more generous in the kitchen? In the bedroom? In the living room? Or how can be more generous in the morning? In the evening?

Doesn't matter how you work through it. Just prayerfully consider ways of being more generous to your sweetie.

Links may be monetized.
Image courtesy of stockimages / FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Do Not Disturb: Third Time’s a Charm A simple challenge that can add fun and variety to your sex life.


(in)courage: I Stole A Television… And Other Lessons In Generosity A story of sacrificial generosity.


Redeeming Marriages: Does Your Spouse Pay For Your Past? Turn your past over to God so that only He has the say in how you will be formed.


 

He’s an Orange, Not an Apple

Saturday, May 18th, 2013

Every now and then I hear a gal talk about someone (other than her husband) with a wistful tone. There is something about that someone that they hold dear and the undertone is that their husband doesn't measure up.

Well, of course, he doesn't measure up! He is a totally different person and she's holding him up to the wrong standard!

 

She's comparing apples to oranges. We need to appreciate people for who they are.

Yes, it's great that your first boyfriend always brought you flowers. Appreciate that someone valued you and brought you a gift you enjoyed.

Now drop it. It's not a standard that you can use with other people (and certainly not your husband).

Your husband is a remarkable person. He sings silly songs, has mad techie skills and knows when you need a hug. Enjoy him for the unique person that he is.

Don't ask him to be an apple. He's an orange.

Comparison is the death of joy.  Mark Twain

Links may be monetized.
Image courtesy of Suvro Datta / FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Calm Healthy Sexy: Slow Things Down and Shake Things Up This Summer Preach it, girl!


The Romantic Vineyard: Flashlight Tag Date Could be fun!


The Forgiven Wife: Intimate Moments Finding real intimacy.


Stuff I've Recommended This Week


 

The Legacy Journey

Wednesday, May 15th, 2013

I joined a chat last night and watched the promo video for Dave Ramsey's newest brain child ~ The Legacy Journey. It's a follow up course to Financial Peace University (where you learn to get control of your finances). The Legacy Journey helps you turn your solid financially planning into blessings all around. They have built a team of teachers that share truckloads of information and encouragement.

Y'all, I can't stress this enough. Finances are one of the main stressors in marriage. Don't ignore your finances. Make a plan and work your finances so that money becomes an amazing tool rather than something you fight about.

Paul and I have been using the principles we learned in the class and, even with major changes in our income, we are sane and making ends meet. We've cleared some debt and we continue to make plans as a team for where our money goes. We're far better stewards of all our resources than we've ever been.

The Legacy Journey is the class that will teach individuals and families how to live and leave a legacy—one that will bless their families, community and the world for generations to come.  Dave Ramsey

Links may be monetized.
Image courtesy of DaveRamsey.com / FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Becoming Minimalist: Leaving the World a Little Better Love it, love it, love it!


Marriage4Good: Adventure and Flexibility Are you in the middle of an adventure with unexpected storms?


The Forgiven Wife: Ripe for Temptation "Had my husband continued down that path, that sin would've been completely on him. But his vulnerability? That one’s on me. It was a closer call than I’d realized."


 








Powered by WordPress

Bad Behavior has blocked 4356 access attempts in the last 7 days.

© 2001-2013 Daily Generous Wife Tips All Rights Reserved