My husband (The Generous Husband) recently challenged bloggers:
My challenge: Make it a point to celebrate the male sex drive anywhere you have influence. Stop allowing sex to be treated as shameful or evil. Proclaim that God gave men a strong sex drive for a reason, and that we must embrace that if we want to have healthy marriages, families, and communities.
My perspective is that men have an easier time of seeing their sexuality as an integral part of who they are. Women have a harder time of making that connection.
Men have an “outie”. Their genitals are right out there where they can see them. They handle them to wash and urinate. At puberty they take on a life of their own and sex drive ramps up.
Women have many cultural messages about “good girls” and our genitals are harder to see and explore.
By the time we are adults and ready to marry, guys are light years ahead in understanding their sexuality. Women can easily see male sexuality as “too much” by comparison.
I think the important thing to emphasize is that male sexuality is not bad, just different. Each gender has something to bring to the bedroom that is important. We’re meant to invite each other into our differences and have our sexual experience and understanding broadened because of that.
We need what our husbands bring to the bedroom and they need what we offer.
As a practical suggestion, I would encourage women to be intentional about exploring their sexuality. Read good books on sexuality, slow down in the bedroom, take more time, talk about sex with your husband, make a point of thinking about sex (remember how good it was last night), and pray about growing in your understanding and experience of sex.
God made us sexual beings and He meant for sex to be enjoyable for both husbands and wives. I believe He called it “very good.”
Oh, lover and beloved, eat and drink! Yes, drink deeply of your love! Song of Songs 5:1b NLT
Ferguson Values: How Long Does It Take to Become Proficient at Marriage? A quality marriage is based on time.
Holley Gerth: You’re Not Compared Start celebrating who you are and the God who made you that way.
Hot, Holy and Humorous: Are You in a Sexual Rut? Throw off the rut and get fresh with your spouse!