Points for Mr. Darcy

April 27, 2013

in the generous life

prideI watched Pride and Prejudice the other night (for the first time).

I don’t normally watch chic flicks (just my personal taste), but a friend twisted my arm and lent the movie to me, so …

There was one scene between the two main characters (Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy) that was absolutely painful and I saw it coming. I kept thinking, surely Elizabeth will be gracious. Nope. She hauls off and blisters Mr. Darcy over some pretty serious assumptions. She didn’t take the time to find out all the facts.

Have I been guilty of that? You bet. And I’ve been deeply sorry and am, hopefully, learning to dig up all the facts before responding. That and, even when there is something to be upset about, it’s still a good plan to speak kindly and respectfully.

Not a bad skill to learn and one that will benefit any relationship (and especially your marriage relationship).

He who loves purity of heart, and whose speech is gracious, will have the king as his friend.  Proverbs 22:11  ESV

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Do Not Disturb: Marriage Challenge: Personal Pursuits and a Question Make margin in your life for personal pursuits. It’s healthy and beneficial for you and your marriage. 


Square1 Ministries: Barriers to Intimacy – A Wife’s Perspective Be aware of these potential problems and be proactive in finding solutions. 


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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Darcy April 27, 2013 at 5:21 am

I quickly perked up when I saw the name of this post because I have friends who call my husband “Mr. Darcy”. We had never seen the movie before meeting them and hearing them call him that and now we own our own copy and watch it often.

I know the scene you are speaking of and one thing that I have always appreciated is that she later acknowledges her wrongdoing not only to him, but also tells her father about how wrong she has been in her assumptions of Mr. Darcy. It’s a good reminder that while we may mess up from time to time, we can still humble ourselves and take responsibility and apologize.


Lee Ann April 27, 2013 at 7:21 am

This is sort of the Reader’s Digest condensed version of Pride and Prejudice, but I still love it for the performances, the gorgeous soundtrack, and the scenery. My husband and I reenacted the “Mrs. Darcy…Mrs.Darcy…Mrs. Darcy” scene at Chatsworth (the film’s Pemberley) on our 25th anniversary trip in 2007. :-)

In the book (please read it if you haven’t), both Darcy and Elizabeth acknowledge their faults to one another when he proposes the second time – essential to any good relationship.

Though I like this movie, my favorite is still the 1995 A&E TV version with Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth. Since it is longer, it has better character development and explains everyone’s motives much more clearly. And since it was filmed for TV, you can watch it in one-hour increments if you don’t like chick flicks. :-D


jayme @ No Regrets Living April 27, 2013 at 6:26 pm

Have you seen Emma? If not, watch it! As great as Mr. Darcy is, Mr. Knightley is soooo good for Emma and quite a man of character!


Fawn Weaver April 29, 2013 at 2:49 pm

When I’ve asked the members of HWC to name their top romance movie, Pride & Prejudice has consistently been in the top 1 and 2 spots. I REALLY need to watch that movie at some point. I even think it’s on Netflix It just seems SO girly I’d hate to put my husband through it. Did your husband watch it with you?


Cathy April 29, 2013 at 3:37 pm

Confession: I think I’ve watched Pride & Prejudice at least half a dozen times, minimum. :) Anyhow, I love your remarks about remaining kind and respectful. I’ve recently being practicing this with my husband. I’ve noticed he, in turn, has become more patient with my own “antics”. :)


Lu April 29, 2013 at 9:07 pm

Love that movie! Your point is very true, we need to fully listen and understand. Too often I am quick to respond before I really listen. Nice post! Glad I found you on the HWC link up!


Kim April 30, 2013 at 11:21 am

Lori, I hadn’t ever seen it until very recently either, and that scene was so painful! I was almost shouting at the tv: “No, no! Go talk with him! Don’t be so foolish!”
Like Darcy commented above, I was so happy when she admitted her wrongdoing to herself and her father.
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Bella May 1, 2013 at 7:22 am

I’ve seen this movie and reread the book so many times. :D

And I always remember this quote every time, “Words and hearts should be handled with care for words when spoken and hearts when broken are the hardest things to repair.”

A relationship can only survive if both parties learn to listen carefully to each other before running their mouth and hurting one another.

Visiting you from the Happy Wives Club link up.


Hannah May 8, 2013 at 8:05 pm

I wasn’t all that thrilled with the newest P&P. I love the old Colin Firth version. Although, I must admit I have both.

But you’re so right. When a wife or husband makes assumptions in their marriage, they falsely “assume” they have the right to be miffed, and act disrespectfully. Not true. This is exactly opposite of what Jesus says when he calls us to love our neighbor as ourselves. It can’t get more neighborly than the person you share a home, bed, name, and life with – your spouse. Loving your spouse means laying aside assumptions and taking the initiative to communicate regularly to avoid painful misunderstandings like Elizabeth and Darcy did.


impressyourguy.com May 9, 2013 at 2:35 pm

Love that movie! Your point is very true, we need to fully listen and understand. Too often I am quick to respond before I really listen. Nice post! Glad I found you on the HWC link up!


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