"I don't feel like having sex."
I hear this from women fairly often about their marriage relationships. My response?
Do you feel like doing the dishes, changing diapers or having that report done by Friday?
Then why do you do it?
We all have things we struggle with, but we manage to find a reason and the time to do them. Usually it is because of love (changing a diaper at 2am was never my favorite thing, but love of that wiggly little person made it happen) or need (I need that paycheck).
So let's think about sex for a minute ...
If you love your husband, can you make a way to meet his needs even when it is not always convenient?
If you understand the need for building your marriage in an ongoing way, can you make a way to be sexually available as a part of what is needed?
Sex really isn't that different from any of the other things in our lives. We just need to think it through and weigh in with what matters. Your marriage relationship matters. You matter. Your husband matters.
(As a side note, for many women, arousal grows as they engage in foreplay. It's perfectly normal. If you don't feel aroused to start with, give it a go and let your body catch up with your willingness. Learn to look forward to sex because of how good you know it will be.)
The best use of life is love. The best expression of love is time. The best time to love is now. Rick Warren
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