Don’t Let It Bite You

March 7, 2012

in the generous life

My husband and I were talking to a couple last night and somehow in the conversation I wound up saying, “Be proactive about problems in your marriage. If you have a struggle with something, don’t ignore it. That’s the kind of thing that will jump up and bite you later if you don’t deal with it.”

As I was saying it, I thought, “that was really very good, that must be God (and I hope I can remember it).”   :)  

So I remembered it and I’m passing it on to y’all.  Don’t let problems sit (and generally get worse). Hit problems head on. If you have financial issues take an FPU class. If you’re struggling with parenting, buddy up with other parents and gets some advice and encouragement. If you’re having problems with sex, see a doctor, see a counselor or read a good book on married sexuality.  

Face the problems, get some help and fix it. Yes, it’s tough to face, but then you get to actually do something about it (and it won’t bite you later). Yes, it might be hard work, but then you get to live in the accomplishment of having fixed the problem. (Success feels really good.)

Some people dream of success… while others wake up and work hard at it.  Author Unknown

Image credit © Danielvw | Dreamstime.com

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Shoot the little foxes in your marriage ~ Five Marriage Sins You Should Stop Committing (from Making Love in the Microwave)

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You can make a difference! ~ Improve Your Marriage Singlehandedly (from Assume Love)

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Be generous! Lori <><

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Tisha March 7, 2012 at 3:20 am

This couldn’t be more true. I’m a person that likes to avoid conflict and confrontation so I’ll let issues fester in me for a long time. Then when it finally comes out, and usually it’s during a “conversation” about something else, it’s much worse than it would’ve been if I had said something in the beginning. This is something I still struggle with everyday. There are issues from our past that I wish I had asked more questions about so they still linger. I’m working hard though to make sure that any issues I have with my husband or anyone else are addressed. I was always seen as the quiet girl that never complained but if only they knew what was going on in my head. :-)

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Jenny March 7, 2012 at 8:34 am

Love the post Lori, I would just add..if there is a problem that you are VERY angry about wait or at least calm down and get your emotions undercontrol so that you can speak calmly and repectfully about the problem. May it’s just hot-heads like me but I find when something comes up usually I’m to mad to talk about it right away with out making it worse. Taking time to think it through and think how I want to talk about any given situation always helps. (sometimes I see it wasn’t a reall problem just my hurt feelings ;))

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Kim March 7, 2012 at 10:06 am

I agree with Jenny that I, too, would make sure to allow for some cooling off time.

However, it is important not to just ignore them, as they will continue to stack up and fall all over you if not taken care of. Been there, done that, not pretty or effective. :-(

I, too, wrote just today about problems, and about wrapping them in a giant bear hug of an embrace in order to tame them.

Great recommendation on taking FPU too. We’ve had couples testify at church at how much smoother their relationship is since taking the class, to say nothing of how much better shape their finances are in!

Maybe we were sharing a party line when these posts came through to us… :-)

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The Generous Wife March 7, 2012 at 11:52 am

@Kim Yup, party line. I really enjoyed your post and am following your blog by RSS now. Bless you for all you do.

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felix March 7, 2014 at 2:18 am

I agreed with u lori, I gots some problem with my boss at work, I think am gonna face it.

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