Looking back on my adolescence, it’s amazing that I actually was able to grow up and procreate. I paid little attention to my own sexuality. I was raised in a “silent about sex” environment with overtones of “good girls don’t” (I don’t even remember going through puberty, one day I woke up with boobs). Then I felt guilty about being curious about boys (I checked out the pictures of nude men in an art book at the library, but someone has erased the genitals) and felt guiltier still that I actually had sexual parts and the beginnings of sexual urges.
I stood between a silent (disapproving) family/church and a world that said go for it, here are your birth control pills. Talk about confused. Even after marrying and having a kid, I still didn’t really know what sex was about. I fretted about “taking too long” or not being “good enough in bed.” My friends had a mixture of confusion and complaints as well.
Well, enough. I’m sure y’all are familiar with the problems. Let’s talk solutions.
I think education is huge and so is opening up and sharing about problems you have and solutions you have found. Here are some good resources.
Secrets of Eve by Hart, Weber & Taylor – written by some truly brilliant people and based on research as well as survey results, one of the best books on female sexuality (it is a bit technical at times).
Intimate Issues by Dillow & Pintus – addresses the more common sexual problems and questions that women face, study guide included in book.
The Marriage Bed – articles (some of which I’ve written), but more importantly a bulletin board where you can get ideas and encouragement about sexual matters. It is mixed gender discussion, but (the very hardworking moderators) try to keep the boards friendly and safe.
Intimacy in Marriage – Julie talks openly about sexual matters with some lovely insights and encouragements
Hot, Holy and Humorous – mysterious no name blogger (this gal will totally make you laugh until you pee)
To Love, Honor and Vacuum – Sheila (another run-laughing-to-the-bathroom blogger)
One Flesh Marriage – Kate and Brad tag team many sexual issues, lots of character stuff as well
Links may be monetized.
Image credit © Inga Marchuk | Dreamstime.com
LINKS TO BLOG POSTS THAT STOOD OUT TO ME THIS LAST WEEK:
The 7 Links Challenge is making its rounds:
Couple Things: Finding the Spark – great date night perspective
Journey to Surrender: The Body Image Battle Continues – how husbands see wives.
To Love, Honor & Vacuum: Why Sex Matters to Your Husband – another helpful male viewpoint.
Marriage Life: Your Words – this must be guy’s week, funny post about words and communication.
Marriage Works: Develop What’s Already There – OK, it’s officially guy’s week, nice insight.
Be generous! Lori <><