What Husbands Want – Work With Me to Build Our Marriage

October 12, 2010

in the generous life

A couple of years back my husband and I asked our lists what they wanted from their spouse (guys emailed me and gals emailed Paul).  I received dozens and dozens of emails from guys and then tabulated their answers and presented the info by subject.  I was deeply impressed with many of their thoughtful comments.  I’d like to share the series again as it is worth rereading from time to time.


Several men talked about how they wanted to read marriage books with their wives or about their interest in going to marriage conferences. Their biggest concern was that their wives saw this not as an interest in building their marriage, but as a personal complaint that they were failing as a wife or that their marriage was “bad.”

Looking for ways to build your marriage is about learning new things, finding new ways to invest in your marriage, learning to communicate better, etc. Even the best marriages can always grow better and a husband’s interest in growing with you in marriage is a good thing.

I encourage you to see any attempt by your husband to build your marriage as a sign that he loves you and wants to continually grow in your marriage relationship.

Generous tip: Ask yourself, has my husband suggested something recently? A book? A getaway for the two of us? Take his idea seriously, remind him of it and make plans to do it!

Be generous!  Lori <><

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Charis October 19, 2010 at 4:23 pm

But what if it’s me making all the suggestions? And my husband is a marriage therapist! =P I would like him to initiate and would love to have sex more frequently. But I know he’s tired from long days at work and hearing other people’s issues. I dont want to add to this burden. I am resorting a lot to masturbating to make up for the lack of sex. Help!


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