A Choice

August 29, 2009

in the generous life

I have a perspective to share with y’all.

You are your husband’s only sexual partner.  If your husband is going to have his sexual needs legitimately met, it will be by you.  If you don’t meet his needs, and to a certain extent his wants, he goes “hungry.”  There is no substitute wife who can fill in for you.

It’s a scary and vulnerable place to be for a husband.  Your husband needs for you to be his sexual partner.  If you don’t, he has no legitimate place to turn.  He craves that intimacy – physically, emotionally, relationally and spiritually.

I do not believe that this is an insignificant need.  Sexuality is an integral part of both men and women.  Making time to be sexual with your spouse is a good, healthy and important choice to make.

In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves.  The process never ends until we die.  And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility. Eleanor Roosevelt.

Be generous!  Lori <><

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

WI Cheesehead August 29, 2009 at 5:26 am

Thank you for the reminder. I am so sad for couples who don’t have a healthy sexual relationship. We don’t have it all the time, but once a week is enough for him in our stage of life (I asked him!) :) I accidentally clicked on the hearts and “voted” it 4 stars. It should be 5 stars!


Country August 29, 2009 at 9:40 am

Great Tip… would LOVE for it to go to the husbands as well. Seems I’ve always had a much greater desire… my husband has all but lost his (meds, etc).


gretchene August 29, 2009 at 1:07 pm

wow, this couldn’t have come at a better time! My husband and I have been on vacation for the past week and this week has been so special for us, we didn’t do anything special, in fact it was one of the most low-key vacations we have ever taken… but with this low-key time came time for us to be more intimate than we have in a LONG time! We aren’t typically intimate more than 2 times a week but this week we have managed to have 4 (yes, 4) nights of WONDERFUL intimacy! It has been great! He is very happy and I am feeling pretty good too!!! ;-)
Thank you for all you are doing for marriages everywhere!!! I was given your website link as a marriage present (in a card…) it has been one of the best gifts EVER!!!


adoherty5 August 29, 2009 at 5:35 pm

This is so true, but yet so hard. Our pastor told us in premarriage counseling that Sex for women is like a lobster dinner (once in a while is good enough), but for men it is like everyday food–they need it or they’ll starve. Time always seems to be an ongoing issue, ya know? I’m always trying to think about how to make it happen, but it seems like laundry, dinner, or something else takes precedent. ERGSH!


sphilpotts August 30, 2009 at 7:31 am

thankyou for this daily tip. it came at a time i really needed to hear it.
we just recently had our first child (5 months ago) and i’m finding it really difficult to feel at all like having sex with my husband. thankyou for the reminder that it is an important part of our marriage and that i need to make sure i take the time to express this to my husband.


restored August 31, 2009 at 9:08 am

It’s a great comment, but why is it that only women are given this tip? He is my only sexual outlet too! Sex is not insignificant for me either.

Lori, how about asking Paul to tell the husbands this.


aprcotrose September 2, 2009 at 8:06 am

My husband and I are both in our 2nd marriage. We both were victims of very critical spouses and endured very verbally and emotionally abusive marriages. As someone who finally found themselves and rebuild themselves the hard way after my divorce, it is of utmost importance to me to make sure he never feels like he is not good enough. Thankfully, he is the same toward me. As newlyweds, this is not an area where we are lacking at the moment, lol, but this post definitely made me aware of the fact that sex can become an issue and to talk about it with him, keep the lines of communication open to make sure that it never does.


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