I don’t know about y’all, but I was raised to be rather private about my body. Relatives got to hug and kiss me (even that was a bit strained). I got the “stranger danger” talk and in general was taught to be rather distant. Add to that, the confusion about sexuality I got from the church, my culture and the media, and I was a right good mess when it came to touch when I got married.
Over the years I have adjusted and readjusted my thoughts about touch. I have a lovely husband who delights in looking at and touching me (with or without clothes). It’s been a rather confusing journey, but I think I am learning a more balanced way that has more to do with what is healthy for me (and hubby), rather than a reflection of what I was taught growing up. I’m a much huggier person (living in Texas will do that to you, as will house church – a steep learning curve, but hugging is a way of life there) and I have seen the deep satisfaction, healing and intimacy building of touch within a marriage.
So my tip today is to suggest that you rethink how you feel about touch. Can you relax your boundaries with your husband? It might be something as simple as building the habit of hugging him when he comes home or a foundation rocking as saying, “you can touch me any time in any way you want, I’m here to please you and bless you.”
Yes, I do touch. I believe that everyone needs that … Diana Princess of Wales
Be generous! Lori <><