Calendar Fun

October 20, 2014

in the generous life

AmyWA commented on yesterday’s celebration post ~

“I have begun a “Family Celebration Calendar” on my computer calendar. I set each event as a yearly reminder that sends me an email. Then I share it on Facebook. Just little things like “Abel Learns to Blow Up a Balloon Day (2004). My goal is to have a celebration for every day of the year by the time I die!”

This is an adorable idea. (Think of what fun you could have around the dinner table.)

I’m just now seeing 2015 calendars in the stores. Grab one (or use your computer calendar) and begin to fill in the holidays and special family days. After that you can look for fun family happenings to celebrate or pick some of the holidays that folks are creating (or create your own!) If you need help finding holidays, here’s a good place to start. Brownielocks and the 3 Teddy Bears – holidays common and silly

I’m a baby step gal, so I think I will work on finding one thing a week to celebrate. (This Wednesday is National Nut Day. I think Paul and I qualify. Now, how to celebrate?)

Celebrate the happiness that friends are always giving, make every day a holiday and celebrate just living!  Amanda Bradley

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Prayer Prompt  Thank God for all the things you have to celebrate.

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The Forgiven Wife: What About Him? The tough choice over who goes first.

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The Generous Wife: Friday Flashback: Random Massage I can think of several variations of this game that would be fun.

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Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Has there been good news in your household?

Has your husband finished his backyard project?
Did your kids finish out the season in track?
Are you being considered for a new position at work?

Time to celebrate!

Celebrations knit hearts together and let people know they are valued. Look for every opportunity to pat someone on the back (make sure you and your husband get a turn).

You don’t have to be extravagant. Perhaps you have a crazy hat that gets to be worn or someone gets to pick their favorite dessert. Celebrations can look like anything that blesses your family. Don’t forget to make up a few silly celebrations too (just because).

Cultivate more joy by arranging your life so that more joy will be likely. George Witkin

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Prayer Prompt  Ask God to show you opportunities to celebrate with your husband, family, and friends.

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Image courtesy of photostock / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Start Positive

October 18, 2014

in the generous life

Over the years I’ve been a part of a number of stressful conversations (in the mediator role).

One of the things I stress out front is the need for a soft start up. (John Gottman talks about a harsh start up. Basically if you start angry then it’s not likely that your “discussion” is going to end well.) I ask folks to talk about the good before they talk about the stressful so that they have a positive framework for dealing with the negative stuff.

Overall I think this is a great concept. Start your day with kind words. Start your meal with thanks. Start a conversation with a sincere compliment. Just writing about it feels uplifting.

And, on the flip side, if you find yourself or your sweetie starting a discussion in a harsh way, I encourage you to ask for a break. Heated arguments just cause destruction. If you find you can’t discuss it at all with relative calm, then get third party help.

If you want to learn more from John Gottman’s perspectives, read The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

Discussions invariably end on the same note as they begin.  John Gottman

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Prayer Prompt  Ask God to help you catch your grumpiness before you speak.

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Intimacy in Marriage: 5 Worst Excuses for Not Having Sex Time to examine the excuses.

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The XY Code: Sometimes He Has No Clue Keep teaching him and keep showing him grace.

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Image credit © Ponsulak | Dreamstime.com

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My husband and I gather with a group of friends weekly to share from our lives, discuss what we’re reading (currently Gods at War) and pray for each other. Oh, and we eat munchies too. 

Paul and I credit much of our personal growth to this group. The exchange of ideas, the sense of family, and the accountability has drawn us to better things.

I understand that not everyone can find or make a group like this, but you can still challenge yourself to grow. One way to do this is to expose yourself to good ideas in other ways, like reading good books or following a new blog. There are some rich resources out there.

The Christian Marriage Bloggers Assoc. (CMBA) has a challenge out this month and here are some of the responses. There’s good stuff in these blog posts and you may find a blogger that speaks to you. Check them out.

Week One: marriage wisdom from family (I listed some in past links, here are a couple more)

Becoming His Eve: Words of Wisdom: Christ Is Our Center
Directed Path Ministries: A Meaningful Father – Son Conversation

Week Two: marriage wisdom from the Bible

The Generous Husband: Words and Wisdom: The Bible
Pearl’s OysterBed: Words of Wisdom: Sex Matters
Becoming a Better Man: The 24 Hour Miracle
The Forgiven Wife: Psalms for My Marriage
Directed Path Ministries: Selfishness is Deadly

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.  Proverbs 27:17  NIV

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Prayer Prompt  Ask God to help you find resources that will challenge and encourage you.

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Happy Wives Club: 25 Frugal or Free Date Ideas for You & Your Husband Have fun and save a few pennies.

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Are you shopping online this week? Please start on the Shop and Support TGW page. It won’t change your purchase price, but I will receive a small commission.

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Image courtesy of stockimages / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Just a little reminder to guard your heart.

From time to time you may meet an “interesting man.” It can happen and there may be nothing wrong with you or your marriage (if you are struggling in your marriage be aware of the areas of lack or wounding).

The important thing is to act appropriately and guard your thoughts. This is where some of the decisions are made when it comes to emotional affairs.

Make sure that you are investing in your marriage and that you don’t let this gentleman take up residence in your head. He’s probably a great guy, but he has no reason to be in your thoughts in an ongoing way. Boot him out.

The bottom line is the greener grass is the grass you water. Water your marriage relationship and guard against emotional affairs.

Do not let loyalty and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Proverbs 3:3 NRS

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Prayer Prompt  Ask God to help you create intimacy in your marriage as an ongoing work. Ask Him to help you stay faithful to your husband.

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Making Love in the Microwave: I Love You Because: Free Printable! Print them out and leave them around for your husband to find.

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Intimacy in Marriage: Being “In the Mood” is a Poor Gauge for Deciding to Have Sex Sex is a responsibility and a privilege.

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Image credit © Alexander Ryabchun | Dreamstime.com

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Surprise!

October 15, 2014

in the generous life

Plan a little surprise for your husband.

Is there something he wants? Can you buy it and wrap as a gift?
Is there somewhere he wants to go? Can you make time and steal him away?
Is there something he wants to do? How can you make that a reality?

I am sneaky challenged, but my husband is way talented in this area and I am learning from him. Even if your husband figures out your surprise, he will be flattered that you wanted to bless him. And you can keep practicing until you sneak one by him.

There is no surprise more magical than the surprise of being loved. Charles Morgan

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Prayer Prompt  Ask God for creative ideas on ways to bless your man.

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The Forgiven Wife: One Year Take up the one year challenge. How would your husband be different after that year? How would you be different?

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The Good Men Project: 5 Reasons to Get Your Wife Out of the House and Into a Hotel Gaye (of Calm.Healthy.Sexy.) guest authors and shares great reasons to have time away with your sweetie.

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Image courtesy of stockimages / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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CMBA_challenge_14

This week’s theme in the CMBA October challenge is to share words of wisdom for your marriage “from the Bible.”

What I want to share is not so much a Bible verse, but rather a perspective about Bible content.

Any time you read the Bible, ask yourself how it could be applied to your marriage.

Going the extra mile for a Roman soldier (Matthew 5:41) or restoring someone in a spirit of gentleness (Galatians 6:1) can translate into generous attitudes and gracious living in your marriage.

Even if the scripture isn’t specifically addressing husbands and wives, the content may apply in principle because much of it is about how to handle relationships.

What’s your favorite Bible verse? How does it apply to your marriage?

All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.  2 Timothy 3:16  NLT

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Prayer Prompt  Ask God to teach you from His Word. Ask Him how to apply those truths to your marriage.

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The XY Code: Tell Your Husband to Go Away! Your man needs time with other men.

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Becoming Minimalist: Speak Your Dreams Be bold this week.

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Image courtesy of Arvind Balaraman / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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