When you and your husband travel or even when you are just kicking around town, look for fun items for your home. Your house will become full of memories of those times spent with your husband. (We have a neat painting from Canada, a sculpted Myrtle wood basket and a striking bird statue from the Oregon coast ~ all wonderful reminders of great times together.)
So live that your memories will be part of your happiness. Author Unknown
Be generous! Lori <><
This week my husband, son and I moved into a new (to us) home. Stressful, yes. I noticed something that I want to change. Both my husband and I got a little short with each other when we were asked to do something that was outside of our "plan" for the day. It's like we had a bit of tunnel vision and we got cranky when we were asked to look at or consider something else outside of that zone.
How well do you handle a sudden change of plans? Most of the time I do fairly well. I think maybe the shortness of energy was a part of the problem for me this time. I had only so much energy and I planned where to use it. Being asked to change that plan meant possibly not having enough energy to do what I wanted. I needed to communicate my needs better and realize that, in the scope of the move, a change in order wasn't that big of a deal.
Patience is the companion of wisdom. St. Augustine
Be generous! Lori <><
Buy some nice "manly" smelling lotion and routinely rub it on the rough and dry parts of your husband's body. It will give your husband some nice sensual touch and make him easier to hug (fewer rough spots).
His body is carved ivory inlaid with sapphires ... Song of Songs 5:14b NKJV
Be generous! Lori <><
Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982
by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Give your husband's ideas a hearing. It's easy to think that the best or only way of doing something is the way we think it should be done. Hard reality is that there are usually a number of ways of doing something and mostly it's about preference. So, bless your husband, listen to his ideas, and make room for his preferences.
It is better to listen in order to understand than to listen in order to reply. Author Unknown
Be generous! Lori <><
Choices are fun. It's nice to have options and you usually get to do something that you enjoy.
As a fun idea, why not create different menus for your husband and give him the choice of what to do. You could do date menus, bedroom activity menus, or meal menus, just to name a few.
Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great. Orison Swett Marden
Be generous! Lori <><
Decisions, decisions, decisions. Life is full of choices. Pray for your husband to have clear thinking, to be able to sense God's direction, and have the ability to make good choices.
You are free to choose, but the choices you make today will determine what you will have, be, and do in the tomorrow of your life. Zig Zigler
Be generous! Lori <><
Here's an interesting tip that I received from a generous wife (thanks, Rebecca!).
.....
A while back I realized that I didn't know my husband as well as I wanted to. I didn't know what my most important jobs were to him, what really made him feel special, what made him feel uncomfortable, etc. So I decided to pick his brain. I typed up on separate lines things that I thought were important that I do on a range of topics. Here are some examples:
Keeping clutter down
Speaking well of you in front of others
Being on time
Greeting you when you come home
Asking for advice
Discussing spiritual things
Having breakfast with you before you go to work
Scheduling time out of the house so you can have some solitude
[and] some intimate topics [as well]
On and on, I think I had between 50-75 things. I printed the papers and cut them into strips.
Last night we went through them all. Categorized them into similar topics, and then it started. He explained his feelings on each item, and to my amazement I saw how little I knew my husband. He put things in categories like "important, please continue - or please improve", "makes me uncomfortable", "really nice, but not necessary", "non-issues, it doesn't make a difference" etc. Now I know where to put my energy and effort.
Things that I thought he would enjoy - like public verbal praise, really made him feel uncomfortable. Me greeting him at the door made him feel attacked sometimes, and guilty that I was dropping everything for him. Me spending time with him at breakfast was difficult because he's in "get ready for work" mode and not "lets sit and talk at breakfast" mode. It was eye opening and I feel so much closer to him.
It gave him the opportunity to express frustrations he had because certain needs weren't being met, and also allowed me to do the same. Now I understand more than ever my husband and see how incorrect I was in so many areas, and it only took about 2 hours. I can be a better wife, now - and he wants to be a better husband. Areas that I was afraid to ask about are now open topics.
I think it was the best thing I've ever done in my marriage.
.....
An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest. Benjamin Franklin
Links to blog posts that stood out to me this last week:
Simple Marriage: Are You Guilty of Making These Marriage Mistakes?
Gwen in Love: Good Intentions
Simple Mom: Back to Basics: Create a Home That Will Last Generations
The Marry Blogger: Batting 1000 & Flexing Your Marriage Muscles
The Dating Divas: Simply Spa ... At Home
The Romantic Vineyard had a truckload of good posts this last week. Just click on the link and enjoy.
Be generous! Lori <><
Think photos. Use them to keep those treasured memories alive. Frame a few wedding pictures for your bedroom wall. Make scrapbooks of your vacations. Use a nice photo for your computer desktop. Send one to your husband in an email with a love note. (If you don't have a nice camera, consider getting one as a family gift for Christmas or other family holiday.)
A good snapshot stops a moment from running away. Eudora Welty
Be generous! Lori <><
photo: PHOTOGRAPHER USA
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